Wednesday, 23 March 2011

All Is Quiet On The Western Front

I have, for the time being, given up on men.  Or at least I'm trying to.  And no - that doesn't mean I'm starting on women!

I'm just taking a little me-time.  Following a conversation with one of my girl-friends, I came to the realisation that what she was saying sounded trite but is ultimately true:

if I'm wondering why men don't treat me bad, maybe I should take a look at how I treat myself.  Because honestly?  It's not great.  I'm hard on myself, and trash-talk myself via my inner monologue all the time.  If I don't like me, why do I expect other people to fall in love? 

So instead, I'm taking a while to figure out a way to like myself a little more, and resurrect and shore up my frankly pathetic self-esteem.  This will hopefully involve lots of fun things to make life good ... but no men.  Not for a while.  Enough with the need for external validation - it's time to get me some internal validation.

Thing is - it turns out it's quite hard to turn off your potential-man-radar, when it's been on for so long!  I've deleted my profile from the dating website, so that's cut off one source, but I still find myself eyeing up men as I walk around in my day-to-day life - arrrrgh!  And going out on Saturday night and not looking at the talent?  In fact, actively not looking at the talent???  Weird!!!

But oddly relaxing!

No comments:

Post a Comment